I've let go of this blog a bit. The last post was of my youngest son's birth, which was over a year ago. Life stays so busy, and it's hard to find the time to blog my thoughts and experiences. But sometimes I feel the need to update, especially if there is a lot weighing on my heart.
These last few weeks have been difficult for me. It actually all started when I saw this character, James Holmes, in court. I was rounding up my children from my moms room, where they were (as usual if we don't intervene) glued to the television.
I looked at what was on as I scooped Titus up to carry downstairs. This man, with bright orange hair, and as pasty as a corpse, staring into nothing...expressionless, unless he was making a face that looked surprised. Something didn't feel right in my soul as I looked at this man. I have experience with being around mentally altered individuals. Many of which I interact with on a weekly basis. I also know when someone looks drugged, as my past is laced with some of those scenarios. Something wasn't right here.
And as my paranoid mind wandered, I began googling "James Holmes conspiracy theories". There weren't many at the time. There are a few now. After reading more and more, over the weekspan or so, I have learned that not much has really lined up. No one is probably paying attention to these things, mainly because we are all worried about a fast food chain and their beliefs. But there is a lot of fishy business going on with this case, and the situation in general.
I'm not going to talk about that much more, as you can draw your own conclusions, and I don't want to influence many on this matter. My conclusion is that our government is sinful, like all of humanity...and because of this, there is much corruption. Corruption we don't see, and corruption that will never be completely healed...until the Lord returns.
As I spent so much time wondering about this stuff...I questioned why God led me to these things. Why did I care? Why do I think this way, and another fully saved, Holy Spirited filled Christian, may not? The Lord makes us passionate about all kinds of different disputable matters...and we don't have to agree on all things.
The Lord has been good in showing me Himself in all of this study. I have come to realize how much I love Him. Our government is man. It can, will, and has failed us...because it is flawed. But God, Father God, will not kill me so he can have more power, so He can have more money. He loves me...He is not failing me. He offered me the only salvation that I can not achieve on my own. He is in control. I'm so encouraged in realizing that He is the only entity that will not fail me. He rules the world...and He lives in me.
